Weekend workshop – Heartbeat Level

01-03.02.2013. ZAGREB

Led by Silvija Tomčik

“Feelings are real. They are not ideas that  can be turned off. They are not abstractions. They are physical manifestations of energy, uniting body and mind and bringing them to the moment.

Feelings are neither positive nor negative; they simply . . . → Read More: Weekend workshop “HEARTBEAT” in Zagreb]]> “HEARTBEAT”

Weekend workshop – Heartbeat Level

01-03.02.2013. ZAGREB

Led by Silvija Tomčik

“Feelings are real. They are not ideas that  can be turned off. They are not abstractions. They are physical manifestations of energy, uniting body and mind and bringing them to the moment.

Feelings are neither positive nor negative; they simply are elemental forces in our life energy with their own vibrations and functions. Each is a level and a vibration of energy that needs to flow freely for us to be really engaged in the present.”

Gabrielle Roth, Maps to Ecstasy

On this workshop we will pay our attention to this intimate, personal and inseparable relationship between our body and our heart, our emotions and our movements. All of us, human beings, unfortunately have become beings that think about how and what they feel, we look for the answers in our head, we search for solutions for our feelings sitting down and thinking about it all. In the same time, we can feel very directly for example: excitement in our belly, fear in our knees, anger in our jaw, sadness in our chest. The way 5 Rhythms practice is teaching on this level of the map, Heartbeat level, is that our vital instincts are in our emotions! My intention and direction on this workshop is to re-establish and trust deeper the communication between the body and the heart, and to find together 10 000 ways to move our body with how and what we feel as it passes through us.  So that we can become fluid with our hearts in its waves, in its openings and closings.

Previous Waves experience needed for this workshop!

Silvija Tomčik, first Croatian 5 Rhythms teacher (Waves training in 2001, and Heartbeat training in 2010, with Gabrielle Roth in the USA) who, as an organiser, brought this practice to Croatia and neighbouring countries. Silvija has been teaching 5 Rhythms regularly both nationally and internationally the last 10 years. She is a committed, passionate and grounded teacher. Teaching and dancing are her natural gifts.

Prices: full price is 105 Euro, early booking price until 18th of January is 90 Euro. Working price is 70 Euro (limited places). Non-refundable deposit is 50 Euro.

Here you can book your place ONLINE

Location: Waldorf school in Zagreb,  “IONA”,  Jakuševečka 6, Zagreb 10000, Croatia

Times: Friday 19-21:30h, Saturday 11-14h te 17-20h, Sunday 10:30-13:30h i 15:30-18h

Information and bookings: info@plesritmova.net, +385 91 565 8084

Simone, Dubai

I really value a . . . → Read More: Tribal Dance – Feedbacks and photos from previous years]]> Thank you  for showing us the way to such a magical experience  I felt we were all alchemists …  I loved the tribe. They gave me the strength I didn’t even know exists, they said ‘yes it is possible!’ to all my dreams even if some of them I’ve classified as impossible.

Simone, Dubai

I really value a leader that is grounded, authentic, joyful yet open for all and any emotions that can arise, caring yet not unconsciously supporting victimhood, not afraid to be their true self while celebrating the uniqueness of all of us, doing the much needed work to unite the fragmented parts of us, our communities and the world. I saw all of this in you, and it was an honor for me to be held by you as I stepped into 2012 and further into my own greatness.

Lindsey, UK

The power of the tribe was so strong for me and through the dance we came deeply in touch to our inner souls and all of them connect to a higher level. If one of the tribe does something good he does it for all of us and if one heals we all heal and grow with her/him. I am sure we changed the world by this.

I am so thankful you guided us through. Your big heart, your deep respect and humility made this wonderful wave possible. And not least you have the humor not to take things too serious – especially yourself : ))

Sabine, Graz

I’d like to thank you this experience, it was powerful and also exciting. Probably one of the best New Year’s Eve in my life.

Although I didn’t really know what exactly means to be in a tribe, my path in this journey absolutely fitted to this topic.

Eva, Hungary

I deeply thank you for guiding us through this journey, your presence, your simplicity and your being down-to-earth. I also experienced deep healing especially during the tree ceremony. I would also like to thank Thierry for his quiet presence.

Karin, Vienna

Most of all I came back inspired. I even wanted to be a 5R teacher for a few weeks! I still have pictures in my mind of the rituals we have done. I appreciate Silvija for the way you can be present in all your states and be transparent with others. The biggest gift you offer is showing exactly who you are and it creates a lot of safety for me to be in all my states. And I love your dry humour that is very close to my own cultural experience. Silvija and Thierry were great leaders of an excellent and willing team. The lingering memory is of inspiration and fullness and there cannot be a better way to start to a New Year.

Brian, Scotland

Every year we are visited and welcomed by the mayor of this village and the principle of the school where we dance, and we have this group photo. Last year he brought us a big bottle of Champagne with Gold!

Beautiful testimony from a dancer who was at the workshop “Slow Dancing With Chaos” in New York, supposed to be led by Gabrielle herself, and then it was led by Jonathan with Robert, and the whole tribe!

As she lay dying we danced

Dance video by . . . → Read More: Gabrielle Roth 1941-2012]]>

Beautiful testimony from a dancer who was at the workshop “Slow Dancing With Chaos” in New York, supposed to be led by Gabrielle herself, and then it was led by Jonathan with Robert, and the whole tribe!

As she lay dying we danced

Dance video by Lucia Rose Horan.

In loving memory of Gabrielle Roth

Testimony by famous New York artist Alex Gray:

In memory of Gabrielle Roth

Funky text from Natasha Blank, New York dancer:

The most badass teacher of our time

Facebook page where you can also participate:

Prayers and reflections for Gabrielle Roth

I love you, Gabrielle, forever…

S.

Predivan tekst plesačice koja je bila na radionici “Slow Dancing With Chaos” koju je trebala voditi sama Gabrielle, a preuzeli su je Jonathan i cijelo pleme.

As she lay dying we danced

Video od Lucie Rose Horan, polusestre od Jonathana.

In loving memory of Gabrielle . . . → Read More: Gabrielle Roth 1941-2012]]>

Predivan tekst plesačice koja je bila na radionici “Slow Dancing With Chaos” koju je trebala voditi sama Gabrielle, a preuzeli su je Jonathan i cijelo pleme.

As she lay dying we danced

Video od Lucie Rose Horan, polusestre od Jonathana.

In loving memory of Gabrielle Roth

Tekst od poznatog umjetnika Alexa Graya:

In memory of Gabrielle Roth

Tekst od Natashe Blank

The most badass teacher of our time

Facebook stranica

Prayers and reflections for Gabrielle Roth

Volim te Gabrielle, zauvijek….

Gdje idu emocije koje nismo proživjeli, osjetili, izrazili i otpustili?

Gdje se spremaju pokreti koje nismo dozvolili, pokreti . . . → Read More: “Ako prolaziš kroz pakao, nastavi prolaziti.” W. Churchill]]> Kroz što god prolazite sada, duboko udahnite, i prođite što svjesnije, sa što više ljubavi, kako se ne bi moralo opet ponoviti – izašlo je na mojoj radionici na Ciklusu “Tijelo kao prolaz”. I evo moje teme za ovaj mjesec…

Gdje idu emocije koje nismo proživjeli, osjetili, izrazili i otpustili?

Gdje se spremaju pokreti koje nismo dozvolili, pokreti koji u tom trenutku nisu bili mogući? Gdje padaju naši snovi u kojima se nismo probudili, naši snovi koje nismo živjeli?

Kada plešemo 5 Ritmova, na način u kojem pratimo svoju vlastiti koreografiju, svoj vlatiti tijek energije, na svoj jedinstven način – ulazimo u prostor u kojem to što nismo svjesno proživjeli se pokrene. Otpustimo suze koje jednom nismo mogli, digne nas radost koju smo stavili sa strane za neka druga vremena, otplešemo one korake koje prije nismo možda znali kako, napravimo one pokrete tijelom koje smo zaustavili ili su bili zaustavljeni.  Slušajući duboko impulse u tijelu koji stvaraju pokrete, otvaramo mogućnost da osjetimo i impulse iz prošlosti. Plešući ih, predajemo ih Plesu, čistimo svoj energetski i tjelesni prostor, i lakši te otvoreniji , bliži nuli, idemo u sadašnji trenutak!

5 Ritmova i njihova praksa Vala, nas uči, vodi i podržava u tom procesu. Val kao prirodni tijek energije, kada nam neki pokret krene da ga naučimo propustiti da prođe kroz svih 5 ritmova, kroz svoj Val. Kada nam pokuca na vrata neka emocija, da ju dozvolimo da ju osjetimo, da ju izrazimo, da ju otpustimo, da je vidimo iz jedne druge lakše i svjetlije perspektive, te da joj zahvalimo i krenemo dalje.

‎“Znam da ako je valu energije dozvoljeno da sam sebe kompletira, to stvara sasvim novi val, i to je zapravo jedino što stvarno znam. Jašući ove valove znači pridružiti se plesu svemira koji, kako Dante kaže, “pokreće sunce i ostale zvijezde”. Gabrielle Roth

Ako gledamo na svaki Ritam kao na jednu etapu u procesu prolaza energije, neki od nas zapnu u jednoj ili drugoj etapi. I sami znate ako nikako ništa ne možete završiti, prije nego što knjiga koju čitate završi, vi započinjete novu.  Ili vam je poznato da ćete rađe svima živima ispričati što vam se dogodilo, objaviti javno na nekoj društvenoj mreži, nego sami sa sobom osjetiti kroz što ste to prošli.  Ili si nikako ne možete dozvoliti da se stvari smire, skidate kraste sa rane prije nego što zacijeli i tako je ponovo raskrvarite, nekada se bojimo da bude dobro, jednostavno dobro.

5 Ritmova nam pružaju praksu za naše tijelo, srce, um, dušu i duh, da se pokrenu na cjelovit i samim time iscjeljujuć način, a isto tako i jedan novi vokabular kao i gledanja sebe i svijeta oko sebe. Počinjemo prepoznavati Tečni Ritam kao stvarni, neki ljudi nas podsjećaju na Stakato Ritam, neka mjesta na Kaos, čujemo neku pjesmu i kažemo ovo je baš dobar Lirski, uhvatimo se kako kažemo djetetu: trebam malo Duboke Tišine.

Zanima me gdje i kako vi vidite, čujete, osjetite, doživljavate 5 Ritmova u sebi ili oko sebe? Oni divno trenuci gdje ples koji plešete u dvorani počinje prelaziti u vaš svakodnevni život. Pozivam vas da podijelite svoj Val 5 Ritmova!  Ako već nemate, da svakako stvorite svoj CD sa Valom 5 Ritmova. Jutarnji Val, Val za auto, Val za prije spavanja, Val za u dvoje….

Veliki pozdrav

Silvija

An Unexpected Blessing An Interview with Gabrielle Roth and Jonathan Horan by Jami Shoemaker

At first glance, you would never guess they were related. She moves with the graceful wisdom of experience, her tall thin figure silent, yet imposing. He bounds through the room with the untamed energy of raw youthfulness. She is dark-haired and angular. Her black . . . → Read More: An Unexpected Blessing-Interview with Gabrielle Roth and Jonathan Horan]]> October 2001

An Unexpected Blessing
An Interview with Gabrielle Roth and Jonathan Horan
by Jami Shoemaker

At first glance, you would never guess they were related. She moves with the graceful wisdom of experience, her tall thin figure silent, yet imposing. He bounds through the room with the untamed energy of raw youthfulness. She is dark-haired and angular. Her black clothes scream “Manhattan!” Her eyes say, “Compassion.” He is blonde and muscular, a surfer boy in bright orange. His restlessness is infectious. His eyes say, “Passion.” She is Mystery. He is Wild Child. But there’s a lot more to these two than meets the eye. For starters, they are mother and son. Their common ground? A lifetime of exploration along the dancing path of self-realization.

An internationally renowned dance teacher, recording artist and theatre director, Gabrielle Roth has spent 35 years exploring the power of movement, teaching the 5 RhythmsTM, training an international team of instructors and guiding people to get off their feet, move their bodies and shake their souls. Her son Jonathan has been her most avid student. He is now her most sought-after instructor.

Recently, I sat down with Jonathan Horan and Gabrielle Roth to talk about their relationship, and the work that binds them.

Jonathan, your mother has been doing this work since before you were born. What was it like growing up with Gabrielle?
Jonathan Horan: It was beautiful. From a very young age, what I was exposed to was catharsis. And that it was natural and that it was good and that it was healing. I was brought up in that. It was very strange for me to grow up at Esalen [Esalen Institute in Big Sur, Calif., where the seeds of the 5 Rhythms were sown] and then around 6 or 7 years old, I made the big jump out into the world and moved to some other places, and I saw that this [catharsis] was not natural everywhere. And there was a noticeable difference between the people who were working on themselves and the people who weren’t. That was really key for me because at that very young and innocent time, I innately felt that this was important, that I liked this energy and that I liked people, and that I got more from people who were taking part in their own process.

Having grown up at Esalen, I was not just exposed to Gabrielle’s work, but the work of just about everybody who was involved in the human potential movement at that time. There was an incredibly different vibe from where other people were doing their thing and from the room where Gabrielle was working with people — an enormous difference in their energy as they were walking out of the room. It was very amazing growing up with a mother who was a teacher who got the respect of just about everybody she ran into. I saw how much she embodied this information that she was passing on, and how beautiful that wisdom was for me.

By the time I was around 9, I was spending the whole time in a weekend workshop. It was amazing to have the respect of the adults around me, because when you take it out of the head, suddenly we’re not talking — we’re dancing; we’re relating. There’s a connection happening between me — a 9 year old, and a 35 year old. To me, that served me so much, because I think about all the kids who never got that. All they got was, “Don’t speak until you’re spoken to.” To have felt that connection growing up gave me an enormous amount of confidence — to know that I had a lot to give even though I was very young.

When I got to puberty, it got really intense. And Gabrielle was a smart parent — she knew I was going to do whatever I wanted to do. But we had a relationship that allowed me to tell her what I was doing and listen to her experience. Then when I went out into the world and did things — if I was way off, I would feel it. There’s something in that that made me take responsibility. I loved having some place to put all that energy that was swirling around; all the experiences and friction with parents and school and teachers and friends and cool people and un-cool people, and to have that all swirl in me in the dance and come out feeling cleansed was a great honor.

Dancing the 5 RhythmsTM does seem to be a starting point for journeying through all the layers and layers of our experience.
Horan: It’s easy to walk around your whole life and miss those layers. The workshops really remind me of writing, because the act of writing forces you to articulate something specific. It’s the same thing when you come to a workshop with an intention.

In all of our lives, we have all of these experiences floating around in our subconscious that haven’t quite been finished. Then if you’re somebody like me — I’ll wake up in the morning and just start writing about anything, then suddenly for one reason or another, my mind flashes back to this experience I had when I was 6 years old, so I’ll write about what was happening to me at that very moment, and I’m processing that information. It’s no longer just floating out there, looming over my head. And in the process of that articulation, I can find the crystal of that experience. Then instead of the experience being this big issue, I now have another way of connecting to the world outside of myself.

The workshops seem to be on that same road. You show up, you haven’t thought about anything in particular, you move, suddenly it’s coming from a different perspective, and it comes down to what you were saying about all those layers. What’s the saying? A picture paints a thousand words. Dance and movement probably paint a million. You could write an entire book about growing up — there’s so much to tell. In the act of dancing, that’s all rushing through your entire body, and you are telling that story, just in a very different way that’s not edited like it would be if you were writing it.

Jonathan with his sister Lucia Horan and his mother Gabrielle Roth

So this is about getting out of your head. This is a completely different language, then.
Horan: Yeah, and there’s not as much respect for it these days. But then, more and more, it’s gaining ground — the power of dance and music. We’re reclaiming them. All the [5 Rhythms] workshops are to one extent or another about ritual. You know, we take back ritual; we ritualize our lives within our communities. The further and further we get away from having all these deep dark secrets, and opening up and seeing the full perspective of what is out there when you’re in a room with all those people, you realize you’re not as isolated or different as you thought you were.

Gabrielle Roth: And when we’re struggling with those layers of experiences, we don’t always do it consciously. We get stuck swirling around inside of it instead of creatively, constructively dealing with it and being responsible for it — “This is what I’m keeping and this is what I’m letting go of.” The dance brings it all to a very essential, ritualistic energetic, which I think is the whole point of this work: to bring everything to that level of essence, that level of energy, where it just moves in rhythms and patterns and waves and cycles and we see it’s all a dance.

Historically with work of this nature, more women than men will show up for it. You know: “Men don’t dance.” Jonathan, do you find yourself acting as a kind of role model for men?
Horan: We’re really working with energy and movement, not dance. That’s one of the big issues though — men and “dancing.” Men can fall into [the 5 RhythmsTM] without having all that resistance that they would have to a particular form of dance, which is more about technique. When we dance in this way, it’s about working with your energy, with your life. Like martial arts — balancing, harmonizing, grounding — and that’s universal. That’s not men or women. That’s everybody.

Roth: I think it’s even more emotional. You know, men are very physical — all the games and sports. There’s a competitive edge, and there’s a form, and rules. And the dance takes us out more into the unknown — into the space of just being yourself. Being your own energy pattern — not a hockey player or a football player — but just feeling all this energy that fuels our need for sports. Then you can ask, “What’s really behind the scene? How do I move and what does that say about me? How can I change that and expand and grow?”

Horan: And you’re going to do better at any sport, or anything else you’re doing, if your internal life is in order. If you have an idea of what’s going on energetically in yourself, in other people, in a community, in the place where you live — if you’re able to look beyond the surface of everything, then you have an amazing secret weapon. It gets you out of the ego and into the spirit.

Out of the ego and into the spirit — through the emotions. Another area we typically have a hard time exploring.
Horan: Yeah, and for me the reason why is because we have the potential to be so destructive. If you bottle everything up for long enough, then it’s really scary to even want to touch the edges of it because you’re afraid that in that, you’re going to lose control and become truly out of control. That’s why it’s so essential to have some kind of practice that, on a regular basis, allows you to just drain all of that stuff out of your body and empty it.

If I don’t dance for two weeks, I feel that build-up. If I don’t dance for two months, I really feel that build-up — all that energy inside that has not been addressed. All those things that slip by. Somehow in the dance, they might not be specifically addressed, but on a higher level, your entire body is going through this cathartic process, draining all the aggression and stress and bringing things back into alignment.

Without doing 20 years of therapy.
Horan: (laughs) Exactly. The beauty of it is that we don’t have to talk about it.

Well, so much of what we experience we can’t put into words.
Roth: Yeah, and we don’t need to. We really can just release in the dance. It’s very organic and you really don’t need to know exactly what it is you’re releasing. I think all of us as Westerners have been trapped somewhere behind our hearts. Finding a spontaneous and authentic way to express ourselves emotionally is very difficult. It’s difficult for all of us. So we share that. We’re all trying to access that honesty — how to be real. To be vulnerable and still be powerful, to know that our power is in our vulnerability, our ability to be truthful and express what is really going on inside of us. And that comes really naturally in the movement.

Gabrielle, how do you feel having your son following in your footsteps and teaching your work?
Roth: It’s a complete blessing. An unexpected blessing. I really didn’t expect this to happen, but it happened very naturally. Jonathan was taking the workshops all the time, and he was my most devoted student. He laughed when I said something funny. I really felt his acceptance, his permission. It’s such a strange thing, because we think about it in reverse, you know, parents giving their children permission. But children give an equal amount of permission back, to be who we are. And he always gave me that. His presence in the room indicated to me that I must have been doing something right.

It just feels like a deep and profound blessing — not only that he would continue to do this work and teach it and grow inside it and allow me to mentor him, but also that he was willing to share it with many other people. I gave him that choice — “I can just pass all of this to you — then I’ll get to see a lot more movies [laughs] or you can share it and we’ll do training.” He wanted to share it.

So this whole tribal world came through him as much as it did through me. I’m very happy, because we have wonderful teachers and incredible communities happening all over the world. And to have him there beside me while I go through all of this is…well…beyond words [laughs]. Thank God I dance!

Jonathan, tell me about the WAVES workshop that you’ll be presenting in Minneapolis.
Horan: Really, the theme behind that workshop is about falling in love with being in your body again. To take your power back in terms of being able to look at the two different sides of yourself — one being what we call the shadow, but which is the polarity to the 5 RhythmsTM. And to be able to completely accept that without judgment and begin to actively work with it so that whenever you fall from the purity of one rhythm, for instance, staccato, there’s just pure clarity and connection and focus given to the tension and rigidity, whether that be in your mind or your body or your heart. That you see it, that you feel it, that you accept it, that you are willing to look at it and go through it and in that act, you transform it and don’t get stuck anywhere. It’s about just really learning how to be again, to be in your body, and the 5 RhythmsTM are an excellent map to the body’s potential.

Roth: Yes, I think the first level is just learning how to see the rhythms as a perspective, as a way to see all of life as just energy and motion. There is a philosophy that life is energy, energy is motion, motion is life — it’s all a dance. And it’s a natural practice, like yoga or any other practice that you can take home and use to expand your movement vocabulary. I think in the beginning we’re really interested in just having a good time. This other stuff comes up, which is why these other “maps” have been created out of the process. But in the beginning, you just move, and everything else unfolds.

When Jonathon talks about the shadow, he’s not talking in a Jungian sense. He’s just saying there’s another side to the Rhythms — how we resist moving. When we actually get inside that resistance and move that resistance it becomes a dance. So we can begin to embrace all the parts of ourselves — all of our energies, including our resistance to movement. Which I have a lot of, actually.

Horan: Yeah, at almost every workshop I do, I walk in with some kind of tension about it, for one reason or another. Then as soon as I get there, as soon as I remember and feel the space and begin to move and feel that shift inside of myself, I always feel better. I always feel better at the end.

Roth: People say this all the time, “I didn’t think I could move today. I didn’t think I could do anything, and now I feel tremendous.” This is what happens when we just let that be and move through it. We come into a whole new level of energy.

Jami Shoemaker lives in the Twin Cities, where she works as a writer and editor and pursues her love of theatre and dance.

chapter from the book “A PATH WITH HEART”

Jack Kornfield

Just as we open and heal the body by sensing its rhythms and touching it with a deep and kind attention, so we can open and heal other dimensions of our being. The heart and the feelings go through a similar process of healing through . . . → Read More: HEALING THE HEART, chapter from the book “A PATH WITH HEART”, Jack Kornfield]]> HEALING THE HEART

chapter from the book “A PATH WITH HEART”

Jack Kornfield

Just as we open and heal the body by sensing its rhythms and touching it with a deep and kind attention, so we can open and heal other dimensions of our being. The heart and the feelings go through a similar process of healing through the offering of our attention to their rhythms, nature, and needs. Most often, opening the heart begins by opening to a lifetime’s accumulation of unacknowledged sorrow, both our personal sorrows and the universal sorrows of warfare, hunger, old age, illness, and death.  At times we may experience this sorrow physically, as contractions and barriers around our heart, but more often we feel the depth of our wounds, our abandonment, our pain, as unshed tears. The Buddhist describe this as an ocean of human tears larger than the four great oceans.

As we take the one seat and develop a meditative attention, the heart presents itself naturally for healing. The grief we have carried for so long, from pains and dashed expectations and hopes, arises. We grieve for our past traumas and present fears, for all of the feelings we never dared experience consciously. Whatever shame or unworthiness we have within us arises – much of our early childhood and family pain, the mother and father wounds we hold, the isolation, any past abuse, physical or sexual, are all stored in the heart. Jack Engler, a Buddhist teacher and psychologist at Harvard University, has described meditation practice as primarily a practice of grieving and of letting go. At most of the spiritual retreats I have been a part of, nearly half of the students are working with some level of grief: denial, anger, loss, or sorrow. Out of this grief work comes a deep renewal.

Many of us are taught that we shouldn’t be affected by grief and loss, but no one is exempt. One of the most experienced hospice directors in the country was surprised when he came to a retreat and grieved for his mother who had died the year before. “This grief,” he said, “is different from all the others I work with. It’s my mother.”

Oscar Wilde wrote, “Hearts are meant to be broken.” As we heal through meditation, our hearts break open to feel fully. Powerfull feelings, deep unspoken parts of ourselves arise, and our task in meditation is first to let them move through us, then to recognize them and allow them to sing their songs. A poem by Wendell Berry illustrates this beautifully.

I go among trees and sit still.

All my stirring becomes quiet

around me like circles on water.

My tasks lie in their places

Where I left them, asleep like cattle…

Then what I am afraid of comes,

I live for a while in its sight.

What I fear in it leaves it,

And the fear of it leaves me.

It sings, and I hear its song.

What we find as we listen to the songs of our rage or fear, loneliness or longing, is that they do not stay forever. Rage turns into sorrow; sorrow turns into tears; tears may fall for a long time, but then the sun comes out. A memory of old loss sings to us; our body shakes and relieves the moment of loss; then the armoring around that loss gradually softens; and in the midst of the song of tremendous grieving, the pain of that loss finally finds release.

In truly listening to our most painful songs, we can learn the divine art of forgiveness. While there is a whole systematic practice of forgiveness that can be cultivated, both forgiveness and compassion arise spontaneously with the opening of the heart. Somehow, in feeling our own pain and sorrow, our own ocean of tears, we come to know that ours is shared pain and that the mystery and beauty and pain of life cannot be separated. This universal pain, too, is part of our connection with one another, and in the face of it we cannot withhold our love any longer.

We can learn to forgive others, ourselves, and life for its physical pain. We can learn to open our heart to all of it, to the pain, to the pleasures we have feared. In this, we discover a remarkable truth: Much of spiritual life is self-acceptance, maybe all of it. Indeed, in accepting the songs of our life, we can begin to create for ourselves a much deeper and greater identity in which our heart holds all within a space of boundless compassion.

Most often this healing work is so difficult we need another person as an ally, a guide to hold our hand and inspire our courage as we go through it. Then miracles happen.

Naomi Remen, a physician who uses art, meditation, and other spiritual practices in the healing of cancer patients, told me a moving story that illustrates the process of healing the heart, which accompanies a healing of the body. She described a young man who was twenty-four years old when he came to her after one of his legs had been amputated at the hip in order to save his life from bone cancer. When she began her work with him, he had a great sense of injustice and a hatred for all “healthy” people. It seemed bitterly unfair to him that he had suffered this terrible loss so early in his life. His grief and rage were so great that it took several years of continous work for him to begin to come out of himself and to heal. He had to heal not simply the body, but also his broken heart and wounded spirit.

He worked hard and deeply, telling his story, painting it, meditating, bringing his entire life into awaraness. As he slowly healed, he developed a profound compassion for others in similar situations. He began to visit people in the hospital who had also suffered severe physical losses. On one occasion, he told his physician, he visited a young singer who was so depressed about the loss of her breasts that  she would not even look at him. The nurses has the radio playing, probably hoping to cheer her up. It was a hot day, and the young man had come in running shorts. Finally, desperate to get her attention, he unstrapped his artificial leg and began dancing around the room on his one leg, snapping his fingers to the music. She looked at him in amazement, and then she burst out laughing and said, “Man, if you can dance, I can sing”.

When this young man first began working with drawing, he made a crayon sketch of his own body in the form of a vase with a deep black crack running through it. He redrew the crack over and over and over, grinding his teeth with rage.  Several years later, to encourage him to complete his process, my friend showed him his early pictures again. He saw the vase and said, “Oh, this one isn’t finished.” When she suggested that he finish it then, he did. He ran his finger along the crack, saying, “You see here,  this is where the light comes through.” With a yellow crayon, he drew light streaming through the crack into the body of the vase and said, “Our hearts can grow strong at the broken places.”

This young man’s story profoundly illustrates the way in which sorrow or a wound can heal, allowing us to grow into our fullest, most compassionate identity, our greatness of heart. When we truly come to terms with sorrow, a great and unshakable joy is born in our heart.

Kao što otvaramo i liječimo tijelo osjećanjem njegovih ritmova i dodirivanjem dubokom i ljubaznom pažnjom, tako možemo otvoriti i izliječiti druge dimenzije svojeg bića. Srce i osjećaji prolaze sličan proces liječenja poklanjanjem pažnje njihovim ritmovima, prirodi i potrebama. Najčešće otvaranje srca počinje otvaranjem prema životnoj akumulaciji . . . → Read More: LIJEČENJE SRCA – poglavlje iz knjige “Staza sa srcem”, Jack Kornfield]]> LIJEČENJE SRCA – poglavlje iz knjige “Staza sa srcem”, Jack Kornfield

Kao što otvaramo i liječimo tijelo osjećanjem njegovih ritmova i dodirivanjem dubokom i ljubaznom pažnjom, tako možemo otvoriti i izliječiti druge dimenzije svojeg bića. Srce i osjećaji prolaze sličan proces liječenja poklanjanjem pažnje njihovim ritmovima, prirodi i potrebama. Najčešće otvaranje srca počinje otvaranjem prema životnoj akumulaciji nepriznate tuge, kako osobnih patnji, tako i univerzalnih patnji zbog ratovanja, gladi, starosti, bolesti i smrti. Povremeno tu patnju možemo iskusiti fizički, kao kontrakcije i barijere oko svojeg srca, ali dubinu svojih rana, svoje napuštenosti, svoje boli, češće osjećamo kao neprolivene suze. Budhisti ovo opisuju kao ocean ljudskih suza veći od četiriju velikih oceana zajedno.

Dok zauzimamo jedno mjesto i razvijamo meditativnu pažnju, srce se prirodno nudi za liječenje. Tuga koju smo toliko dugo nosili, od bolova i razmrskanih očekivanja i nadanja, počinje iznicati. Tugujemo zbog prošlih trauma i sadašnjih strahova, zbog svih osjećaja koje se nismo usudili svjesno iskusiti. Bilo kakav osjećaj stida ili nedostojnosti u nama sada izniče – mnoge rane i obiteljske boli, majčinske i očinske rane koje zadržavamo, izolacija, bilo koja prošla okrutnost, fizička ili seksualna, sve su te rane pohranjene u srce. Jack Engler, budhistički učitelj i psiholog na Harvardskom sveučilištu, opisao je meditacijsku praksu ponajprije kao praksu tugovanja i otpuštanja. Na većini duhovnih povlačenja u kojima sam sudjelovao, gotovo polovina učenika radi s nekom razinom tuge: poricanjem, ljutnjom, gubitkom ili žaljenjem. Iz tog rada s tugom proizlazi duboko obnavljanje.

Mnoge od nas su učili da ne smijemo biti dirnuti tugom ili gubitkom, no nitko od toga nije izuzet. Jedan od najiskusnijih upravitelja staračkih domova u zemlji doživio je iznenađenje kad je došao na povlačenje (retreat) i tugovao za svojom majkom koja je umrla godinu dana prije toga. “Ova je tuga,” rekao je, “različita od svih drugih s kojima sam se susretao. Ovo je moja majka.”

Oscar Wilde je zapisao: “Srca postoje da budu slomljena”. I dok se liječimo meditacijom, naša se srca otvaraju kako bi osjećala potpuno. Pojavljuju se snažni osjećaji, naši duboki i neizrečeni dijelovi, a zadaća nam je u meditaciji najprije pustiti ih da se kreću kroz nas, zatim prepoznati ih i dopustiti im da pjevaju svoju pjesmu. Pjesma Wendella Berrya ovo prekrasno ilustrira.

Idem među drveće i sjedam nepomično.

Sva moja uzrujanost postaje mirna

oko mene poput krugova na vodi.

Moji zadaci svi na svojem mjestu gdje

ostavi ih, popust uspavane stoke…

Onda dolazi ono čeg’ se plašim.

Nakratko živim pred tim.

Ono čeg’ plašim se u tom nestaje,

A moj strah od toga prestaje.

Ono pjeva i ja čujem tu pjesmu.

Dok slušamo pjesme svojeg bijesa ili straha, usamljenosti ili čežnje, otkrivamo da ne ostaju zauvijek. Bijes se pretvara u žalost; žalost se pretvara u suze; suze mogu teći dugo, no onda izlazi sunce. Sjećanje na stari gubitak pjeva nam pjesmu; tijelo se trese i ponovno proživljava trenutak gubitka; a onda oklopljenost oko tog gubitka konačno pronalazi slobodu.

U istinskom slušanju svojih najbolnijih pjesama možemo naučiti božansku umjetnost opraštanja. Dok postoji sustavna praksa opraštanja koja se može posebno njegovati, opraštanje i samilost izniču spontano otvaranjem srca. Na neki način, osjećanjem vlastite boli i tuge, vlastitog oceana suza, doznajemo da je naša patnja uzajamna, te da se misterij i ljepota i bol života ne mogu razdvojiti. Ova univerzalna patnja je također dio naše međusobne povezanosti, a suočeni s njome više ne možemo zadržavati svoju ljubav.

Možemo naučiti opraštati drugima, sebi i životu za njegovu fizičku bol. Možemo naučiti otvoriti svoje srce prema svemu tome, prema patnji, prema užicima kojih smo se plašili. U ovome otkrivamo osobitu istinu: duhovni se život velikim dijelom – a možda i u cijelosti – sastoji od prihvaćanja sebe.

Dosita, prihvaćanjem pjesama svojeg života, možemo početi stvarati za sebe mnogo dublji i veći identitet u kojem naše srce obuhvaća sve u prostoru beskrajne samilosti.

Najčešće je ovaj ljekovit rad toliko težak da nam treba druga osoba kao saveznik, kao vodič,  da nas drži za ruku i inspirira našu hrabrost dok kroz sve to prolazimo. Onda se događaju čuda.

Naomi Remen, liječnica koja se umjetnošću, meditacijom i drugim duhovnim praksama služi u liječenju oboljelih od raka, ispričala mi je dirljivu priču koja ilustrira proces liječenja srca, koji prati liječenje tijela. Opisala je mladića koji je imao dvadeset četiri godine kad je došao njoj nakon što mu je jedna noga amputirana kod kuka da bi mu spasili život od raka kostiju. Kad je počela raditi s njime, imao je snažan osjećaj nepravde i mržnje prema svim “zdravim” ljudima. Činilo mu se gorko nepravednim što mora propatiti taj strašan gubitak tako rano u svojem životu. Njegova su tuga i bijes bili toliko snažni da je trebalo nekoliko godina neprekidnog rada s njim kako bi počeo izlaziti iz samoizolacije i liječiti se. Morao je izliječiti ne samo tijelo nego i slomljeno srcei ranjen duh.

Radio je uporno i duboko, pričajući svoju priču, slikajući je, meditirajući, dovodeći čitav svoj život u polje svjesnosti. Dok se polako iscjeljivao, razvijao je duboku samilost prema drugima u sličnoj  situaciji. Počeo je posjećivati ljude u bolnici koji su također doživjeli teške fizičke gubitke. Jednom je prigodom – ispričao je svojoj liječnici – posjetio mladu pjevačicu koja je bila toliko potištena gubitkom grudi da ga nije htjela ni pogledati. Sestre su držale uključen radio, vjerojatno u nadi da je malo razvedre. Bio je vruć dan i mladić je došao u kratkim sporstkim hlačicama. Napokon, u očajnom pokušaju pridobivanja njezine pažnje, odvezao je svoju umjetnu nogu i počeo plesati po sobi na jednoj nozi, puckajući prstima na glazbu. Pogledala ga je zapanjeno, a zatim prasnula u smijeh i rekla: “Čovječe, ako ti možeš plesati, onda ja mogu pjevati”.

Kad je ovaj mladić počeo raditi s crtanjem, olovkom je načinio skicu vlastitog tijela u obliku vaze s dubokom crnom pukotinom po cijeloj dužini. Ucrtavao je pukotinu uvijek iznova, škripeći zubima od bijesa. Nekoliko godina poslije, da ga ohrabri u dovršenju procesa, moja mu je prijateljica ponovno pokazala te rane slike. Ugledao je vazu i rekao: “Oh, ova nije završena”. Ona je sugerirala da je onda završi, on je to učinio. Prošao je prstom preko pukotine, govoreći: “Vidiš ovdje, ovuda prolazi svjetlost”. Žutom je olovkom ucrtao svjetlost kako prolazi kroz pukotinu u tijelo vaze i rekao: “Naša srca mogu postati snažna na puknutim mjestima”.

Priča ovog mladića duboko ilustrira način na koji tuga ili rana može zacijeliti, omogućujući nam da narastemo u najpuniji, potpuno samilosni identitet, u neizmjernost srca. Kad se istinski izmirujemo s tugom, u našem se srcu rađa velika i nepokolebljiva radost.